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There may even be times when you look at your spouse and think, "How did we get here?" ... and "Why don't we like each other very much?"

If that describes your marriage today (or the marriage of someone you know) ... you might just be caught in the desperate spin of the "crazy cycle"!

Thankfully, according to Dr. Emerson Eggerichs of Love and Respect Ministry - this cycle can be broken! With God's help, a little knowledge and understanding - and the desire to make things right in your union - you can stop the spinning!

So what is this "crazy cycle?"

Not long ago, Dr. Eggerichs visited "FamilyLife Today" to help us understand this tumultuous time in a marriage. The timely, marriage-saving information he shared is our gift to you, on a 2-CD set "Love and Respect," as you give a gift to FamilyLife this month.

Here is just a sampling of what he shared: the concept of the "crazy cycle" grew from the words found in Ephesians 5:33, "Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must see to it that she respects her husband." (Ephesians 5:33, NASB)

Here's the bottom line: Men crave respect. More than anything. Women want to feel loved. More than anything.

The vicious "crazy cycle" starts its reckless spin when one or the other feels his or her basic need is not being met. When a wife feels unloved, she begins to act in ways that feel disrespectful to her husband. Without respect, he shuts down ... which leads him to act less loving. And on and on it goes.

Family Life Today