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“You have captivated my heart, my sister, my bride; you have captivated my heart with one glance of your eyes. How beautiful is your love, my sister, my bride!” Song of Solomon 4:1

What one thing would improve your marriage more than any other one thing ?

The number one answer on the board is: communication . If you want to have a hot, happening, life-time romantic relationship, there's just some things that you need to get said—often, regularly, and in some cases, daily.

We're looking at Song of Solomon on the broadcast this week. Most preachers take the long way around this book of the Bible, but God loves it when His children enjoy the blessings He planned for them in marriage. Now, that Song of Solomon couple had their Ph.d in romantic love. Their conversation may sound odd at times to us but God loves the way they express their love.

Now I don't mean to pick on the men, but this whole idea of expression is a challenge to the guy who says, “I woo'ed her, I won her, and I wed her. I told her on the day we got married thirty years ago that I loved her. If I ever change my mind, I'll let her know.”

We laugh at that attitude but it's more common than we think. One partner is emotionally constipated and the other is emotionally famished. So we really need to get specific on what we need to say to those we love. Married or single, here are four phrases we all can practice expressing:

“ I love you. ” The key is to say it deliberately. Don't mumble it into the phone and then hang up. Men, get your wife in your arms, look in her eyes, and say it.
“ I need you. ” Here's another one, men. In your private moments tell that woman who has stood by you how much you need her. Go ahead—“My actions may sometimes communicate the opposite, but I want you to know that I know that I really need you.”
“ There is no one like you. ” OK, ladies. Every man is one among millions. At work, he's one among thousands. At church, he's one among hundreds. So when he walks through that door each night, he desperately needs to know he is your one and only. And that leads to...
“ I thank God for you. ” Tell your beloved that they are a gift from God. Better yet, pray aloud together. Let him/her overhear you tell the Lord how grateful you are that God gave him or her to you.
Get the words said. Yes, it really matters. Expressing your love is a huge piece of that lifelong romantic love that God designed for you and that you both desperately want.